I've done it!!!! YIPPEE!!!!!

Well folks the time has come to deliver some extremely good, understated and belated good news to you all:

"at approximately 5.45pm on the afternoon of Thursday 22nd June 2006, Lewis Cains, an unknown struggler from the south east managed to hole a 4 foot putt on his 36th hole of the day at Bishops Stortford Golf Club in Hertfordshire to finally pass his PGA Playing Ability Test by a victorious margin of 5 shots on his no-less than 8th attempt!!!! He could be seen visibly punching the air repeatedly, shouting 'come on!' and then giving his unexpecting father a huge hug as the dawning of an accomplishment he had been dreaming of for over a year and 7 setbacks bestowed upon him........"

What can I say folks, I finally did it! I have writing this blog for over year and attempting to justify all my failures but now I can finally write one in triumph over a golfing monster that has plagued me for what felt like an eternity. First i'll briefly sum up the events on the course and then attempt to put in to words what this whole experience has taught me.

I dont know where to begin really. I guess everything i've worked towards finally came together and I finally managed to handle the immense pressure this test can place on you, particularly on the back 9 holes on the second round when you can see the finishing line. Don't get me wrong, I would say in terms of form I was way short of my best. However, as I have set out to achieve, I have now created a 'B' game which can still get me round a golf course under pressure.

The morning round wasn't the most inspiring round i've ever played. My ball striking was uncharacteristically poor and I had to make quite a few saves towards the end of the round to post 78 which left me with an 8 shot cushion for the afternoon.
I felt confident though. After all, I hadn't played well, so in my eyes I could only improve in the afternoon so I was really liking my chances.

The afternoon didn't exactly get off to the start I required either. My opening tee shot with a 3 iron went smack in to a tree on the right hand side and dropped down at a point which must have only been about 80 yards away from me! Thankfully, I managed a safe bogey and played a much steadier front 9 holes of 38 (+2). This is went I really started feeling the heat as I found myself stood on the 10th tee with a 6 shot buffer between succes and failure.
To be honest I found myself having to make a decision: can I handle the nerves for just 2 hours more and deal with what happens or do I take the safe route and bottle the whole thing (which I've done twice from this scenario). This is when I was amazed at how calm I was and the decision was simple 'you only have to do this once so focus and play each shot on its merit' (dads invaluable advice). I took great comfort in the feeling that I for the first time felt fully in control of what I was doing. I had a game plan that I knew worked so all I have to do is stick to it and focus 110% on each shot and see what happens. Thankfully I played a super back 9 holes which left me stood on the last tee still with that 6-shot buffer.

This is when it could have gone 'tits-up' completely but I believe that fate more than anything else got me through what transpired:
I proceeded to push my 5 wood tee shot way right into the trees. 'Whoops' I thought and with a rye smile towards dad I grabbed a provisional ball. Then, I completey nobbled the second ball along the floor into another tree which shot it off way in to the trees again, definitely lost!!!!
"Oh dear"!
I said to my playing partners that I wouldn't hit a third ball. I was desperate to go and find my first ball and knew if I ended up having to hit 5 off the tee that I would need the walk back to regain some composure. Thankfully my first ball appeared and I managed to recover back to the fairway. As I pulled 8 iron from the bag for my third shot I instantly felt incredibly focused on what I wanted to do and completely faithful that I could hit the ball in to the heart of that green which I did! This was when it finally dawned on me that I had done it! I'd passed and nothing could stop me now. I know i'm an iffy putter at times but not even me could take 7 putts on one green. That walk up there was sweet. I'd been waiting for it for so long and it felt every bit as good as I thought it would be. As I tapped in for my second round of 74 I couldnt help with but shout in excitement and relief.


This definitely feels like the best day of my life to finally get a weight off my shoulders and overcome this test which has destroyed my confidence for over a year. Now, I never have to do it again. I can now fully focus on my career and the next stage of my life, something I've been desperate to be able to do.

If I could offer some words of advice to any golfers who find themselves facing what I've been through and what this experience has taught me, then here you are:
1/ Never ever give up on it! It will happen!
2/ Get a pre-shot routine that guarantees you are fully prepared to hit every shot you face.
3/ Play one shot at a time and play percentage golf from the tees. As dad says 'you are always in the hole if you hit the fairway!'
4/ Have a game plan before you start the round. I found this crucial in helping me stay in the present and gave me confidence because I knew exactly why I was approaching each shot in the way I was and what I was trying to achieve. It reduced the need for worrying about shots later on in the round.
5/ Deep breathing can make the world of difference. I made a point of deeply exhaling just prior to beginning my swing and I believe this got rid of a whole load of tension.
6/ MOST IMPORTANT - trust your ability to swing the club. The 11th at Bishops Stortford has trees left and out of bounds all of the way down the right. It is a potential cardwrecker. I applied myself to this particualr tee shot more than any shot on the round probably and actually enjoyed the idea of putting myself to the test. The fact that I nailed it about 290 yards down the middle definitely re-inforced my belief in this particular advice!
7/ Trust your natural instinct. This particularly applies to chipping and putting. Also, I've learned that I perform better when I vent frustration. It's better for me to 'get it out' provided it's done in a way which doesn't affect anyone else's game or reflects badly on me.

Dad, thank you so much much for being there today. You were instrumental in keeping me calm and although at times it looked like I was angry, trust me, I was fully in control. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did and it was sweet to pass this in front of you.

Thats about all I can write. I am so pleased that I stuck with it. Its horrible to fail anything, let alone 7 times so I can say that this feels like my greatest achievement to date. I honestly believe that I will raise my game a notch now. We'll see.

The next chapter of my life has finally begun........